Conversations About Death and Dying: Why They Matter

Dying Well Matters: The Conversations We Avoid Are Sometimes the Ones We Need Most

By Zeenat Noorani, Co-founder and CEO of Let’s Talk Better CIC

When was the last time you had a conversation about death, dying or what you would want if something unexpected happened?

Perhaps it is something you have thought about but never quite found the words to discuss. Maybe you have put it off because it feels uncomfortable, too upsetting or simply something you would rather not think about.

Yet these are often the conversations that matter most.

On 27 October 2026, Let’s Talk Better CIC (LTB), in partnership with Bromley Dementia Friendly Community (BDFC), brought the Bromley community together for Dying Well Matters – Conversations That Count.

The purpose was simple but important: to raise awareness, encourage open conversations about death and dying, share knowledge and personal experiences, and remind people that they do not have to navigate difficult times alone.

More than 75 people joined us, including speakers, panellists, exhibitors, professionals, voluntary organisations, community groups and members of the public.

What unfolded was much more than an event. It was a day of honesty, compassion, connection and, above all, humanity. I couldn’t have asked for a more meaningful and inspirational day.

Why talking about death and dying matters

At Let’s Talk Better, we believe that every conversation matters. Sometimes the conversation we are most afraid to have is the one we most need.

Talking about dying is not about being morbid. It is about recognising that life is precious, that circumstances can change unexpectedly and that having conversations early can make an enormous difference.

It is about understanding our choices, sharing our wishes, making plans where possible and helping the people around us understand what matters to us.

We wanted to create a welcoming space where people could ask questions, listen without judgement and explore subjects that are often left until a crisis occurs.

From dementia and caring responsibilities to palliative care, wills, lasting powers of attorney, funeral arrangements, faith, culture and personal wishes, the day offered an opportunity to learn, reflect and consider the importance of planning ahead.

As I said on the day:

“Today is not about being morbid. It is about being human.”

Being a partner of Bromley Dementia Friendly Community made this collaboration particularly meaningful to me. I am honoured to be working alongside an organisation that recognises the importance of bringing people together, sharing information and supporting those affected by dementia.

A day of voices, experiences and stories

One of the most important parts of the day was hearing from people who were willing to share their knowledge and, in some cases, deeply personal experiences.

Our speakers brought different perspectives to the conversation, helping us look beyond the practical arrangements and understand the emotional, personal and human experiences that sit alongside them.

Lauretta Wright shared her experience of living with cancer. Her story was deeply moving and reminded us of the strength, uncertainty and resilience that can exist alongside a life-changing diagnosis. It was a powerful reminder of the importance of hope, support and making the most of the time we have.

Brenda, a BDFC partner and Rotarian, spoke about the recent loss of her husband and the challenges of caring for him. She shared how art and poetry had helped her express and process some of the emotions surrounding her experience.

Her contribution highlighted something that can sometimes be overlooked: the emotional journey of carers, the impact of loss and the different ways people find a way to cope. It was a reminder that everyone experiences grief differently and that sometimes creativity can provide a way to express what words alone cannot.

We also heard from professionals and organisations working across dementia support, bereavement, health and social care. Their contributions helped people understand the support available and why it is so important to have conversations while there is still time and opportunity to make informed choices.

We had also planned a practical Last Wishes workshop with Faye Cox, Celebrant. Unfortunately, Faye was unable to deliver the workshop as she had to conduct a funeral. We were very grateful to Michelle Harvey, who stepped in at short notice to speak about Last Wishes and help attendees think about the things that matter to them and how they might begin recording their wishes.

The conversations were not always easy, but they were important. And that is precisely why we need spaces where they can happen.

Conversations that brought different perspectives together

Alongside the speakers, our panel discussion brought another important dimension to the day.

Our panellists shared their professional knowledge, experiences and different perspectives, helping to explore some of the questions, concerns and realities surrounding dying well, planning ahead, dementia, bereavement and supporting those approaching the end of life.

Their openness and willingness to engage with the questions created space for honest discussion and reflection. It was an opportunity to explore subjects from different viewpoints, challenge assumptions and help people feel more comfortable asking questions they may otherwise have kept to themselves.

For attendees, hearing these different voices together in one room was valuable. It helped bring the practical and emotional aspects of dying well into the same conversation, while highlighting the support, knowledge and experience available within our community.

The feedback reflected just how important it was to have these conversations in an open, welcoming and supportive environment.

Sometimes the smallest moments have the greatest meaning

One story shared by Nikki has stayed with me.

An older woman living alone with dementia had seen the event flyer and decided to attend. She stayed for the whole day.

At the end, she thanked Nikki and explained that she might forget much of the information, but she had enjoyed the day and found it helpful. She even offered to make a donation, which Nikki kindly declined, saying that her feedback was enough.

It is a simple story, but it says so much.

It reminds us that events like this are not just about the information shared, the number of people in the room or the organisations represented. They are also about connection, belonging and helping someone feel seen and included.

Nikki reflected:

“This is exactly why the BDFC does what it does: to provide a forum where we can share information and these all-too-precious moments of real human connection with those who are affected by dementia.”

That, to me, is what community is about.
Sometimes the greatest impact is not measured in how much information someone takes away, but in how they feel when they leave.

A personal reminder of why these conversations matter

For me, the event carried an added personal significance.

My uncle, who was also my godfather, passed away just one day before the event.

I found myself preparing to stand in front of a room of people and encourage them to have conversations about life, loss, wishes and the things that matter, while personally experiencing the reality of losing someone I loved.

It brought home, in a very real way, how important connection, time and the words we share with one another can be.

We cannot always choose when difficult moments arrive. We cannot always know what lies ahead. But we can try to make space for conversations while we have the opportunity.

Not every conversation needs to be perfectly worded. Sometimes it is simply about asking a question, listening, sharing a memory or letting someone know what they mean to us.

I am sharing this because these conversations are not just professional topics or event themes. They are part of being human. They touch every family and every community in different ways.

And perhaps that is why they matter so much.

A community effort, from our youngest contributors to our volunteers

An event like this does not happen because of one person or one organisation. It takes a community of people who believe in the purpose and are willing to contribute their time, skills, ideas and energy.

One particularly lovely contribution came from the children at St James School RC Primary School, Petts Wood, who created the beautiful bunting that helped decorate the event. Their involvement brought a special touch to the day. It was a reminder that community participation can cross generations, and that young people can have a part in creating something meaningful, even when the subject itself may be difficult.

I also want to give particular recognition to the volunteers from Bromley Rotary Game-Changers and Rotary E-Club Orpington.

Their contribution was invaluable. They gave their time, energy and practical support to help the day run smoothly, from welcoming and assisting people to supporting the many arrangements behind the scenes.

Volunteers are often the people who make the difference between an idea and an event that genuinely works for everyone attending. Their generosity and commitment should never be taken for granted. Without them, the day would not have been the same.

This is what happens when people and organisations come together with a shared purpose. Every contribution matters.

With heartfelt thanks to everyone who made the day possible

There are many people and organisations I would like to recognise and thank.

To Nikki Fishman and Bromley Dementia Friendly Community, thank you for your partnership, encouragement and belief in the importance of bringing these conversations into the community.

To Chris and Helayna, thank you for the Innovation Fund support that enabled this collaboration and helped us deliver an event that brought so many people together around a subject that deserves greater attention.

To our Mayor of Bromley, Councillor Christine Harris, thank you for taking the time to join us and for sharing such a heartfelt closing speech, including your own reflections and experiences. Your presence meant a great deal to us.

Thank you to all our speakers and panellists for giving their time, knowledge and personal experiences so generously.

Your willingness to share helped create an honest and meaningful day.

To our exhibitors and participating organisations, thank you for bringing your information, services and expertise into the room. It was wonderful to see so many different organisations come together and have the opportunity to connect with one another as well as with the community.

A special thank you to our supporters and contributors:

Radfield Home Care for supporting the day with refreshments.
Thackray Williams LLP for providing the first 50 tote bags for attendees.
Clarity Consulting for designing and printing the event information leaflets.
Symbiosia for the beautiful handmade bunting.
St James School RC Primary School, Petts Wood, and its children for creating such a lovely addition to the event.
Bromley Rotary Game-Changers and Rotary E-Club Orpington for their invaluable volunteering and practical support.
Roberta Silva for suggesting the school involvement and helping make that contribution possible.

And a special thank you to Sarah Knight, Head of Marketing at W. Uden & Sons Funeral Directors, for capturing the day through her photography. These photographs help preserve the moments, people and connections that made the event so special.

Finally, thank you to everyone who attended, shared feedback, asked questions, listened and took part. Your presence helped make the day what it was.

What happens next?

For Let’s Talk Better, this is not the end of the conversation. It is the beginning of something we hope will continue to grow.

The response to Dying Well Matters has shown us that there is a real appetite for safe, welcoming spaces where people can talk openly about subjects that are often avoided.

We would like to build on this by exploring the development of a Dying Well Community Hub: a place where people can find information, guidance and signposting to local support, alongside opportunities to hear from others with lived experience.

We also hope to develop a network of Dying Well Champions: people who can help encourage conversations within their own communities and point others towards trusted information and support.

Alongside this, we would like to offer smaller, more focused workshops on particular aspects of dying well, planning ahead, dementia, bereavement and supporting those who care for others.

These ideas will take collaboration, commitment and funding to develop. We would welcome conversations with organisations, professionals, community groups and individuals who share this vision and would like to be involved.

Our hope is that this event becomes part of a wider movement towards making these conversations more accessible, less frightening and more ordinary.

The conversation does not have to wait

The feedback we received from attendees, speakers, panellists and exhibitors was incredibly encouraging.

Former Mayor of Bromley, David Jefferys, described the event as a great success, saying it had helped to surface important issues and begin crucial conversations.

Another attendee told us how much their brother had enjoyed the day and hoped there would be more events like it. Others spoke about the importance of being curious, opening up difficult conversations and making people feel welcome.

We were also reminded by healthcare professionals how much difference it can make when people have these conversations while they are well enough to consider what matters to them, rather than waiting until a crisis.
That feedback is what gives us the encouragement to keep going.

I would like to leave you with a question:

If there is a conversation you have been putting off, what might change if you began it today?

It does not have to be a big conversation. It does not have to have all the answers. It simply needs a beginning.

At Let’s Talk Better, we will continue to create opportunities for people to speak, listen, learn and feel less alone. Because behind every difficult subject is a person, a family, a story and a need to be heard.

Don’t Wait For The Moment. Start The Conversation.

Every voice matters. Every conversation matters.

Read and listen to more about Dying Well Matters

Thank you to the local media and platforms that helped raise awareness of the event and its message:

*All event photographs credited to Sarah Knight, Head of Marketing, W. Uden & Sons Funeral Directors